Women of Faith

I have never been to a Women of Faith event before and am really excited about going to this one! I am in need of some good girl time! :) 

CALM IN THE STORM

Psalm 116:1 I love the LORD, because he has heard my voice and my pleas for mercy.

Seven years ago on May 17th, I thought I was going to hold my son for the last time. I thought I was going to watch him die right in front of me. I felt the horror as I watched his intestines ooze out of his tummy. You see, Caleb is not the "typical boy". Caleb was born with an omphalocele. Simply put Caleb was born without being stuffed. His abdominal organs were in a sack outside of his body. And that sack was growing skin so we could wait to do surgery until he was 3 or 4 years old. But God had other plans.

It seemed like a typical visit to the surgeon except they moved our appointment up to earlier in the day and the surgeon was running behind schedule which Dr Raynor rarely did. So we played and I prepared the bandages to wrap Caleb's tummy back up when the exam was done. Dr. Raynor came in and examined Caleb; he said "Things look great! I'll see him in…" and then the place on his abdomen where scab, old skin and new skin all joined split open and Caleb's intestines began to push their way out. "Well that doesn't look…" As Caleb continued to cry the split tore open more and more. "Can you get him to stop crying?" How do you get an 11 week old to stop crying when his skin is tearing open? I started crying and thinking, "This is it. He is dead. I'm going to watch my son die right in front of me."

This is when Dr. Raynor stopped, looked me in the eye and said, "It's going to be ok." I thought, "I am the only nurse in his office. I need to help him wrap it." And so with that I was filled with peace. I became calm and understood that god has my son where He wants him. That day started a month of surgeries, tubes everywhere, hearing "he's a very sick little boy," and "there is nothing we can do as doctors; only God can save him." Through all this I felt peace. Yes, there were moments we cried out to God because we thought we were going to lose him but through it all we felt God right there with us.

Today he is an active 7-year-old. You wouldn't be able to tell anything different about him until he lifts his shirt. I am not some super-mom but rather a weak mom made strong by the power of Jesus. [But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Cor 12:9). And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).]

We celebrate May 17th as a reminder of what God has done for us. As Dr. Allman, a professor at DTS, says, "What God has done in the past is both a model and a promise of what He will do in the future, though He is too creative to do the same thing the same way twice." We all need to remember what God has done for us we need to celebrate and tell others so we can be encouraged to continue on in this life.

Caleb

Six years ago today at 9:30 am we were sitting in the Surgeon's office waiting for Dr Raynor. He was behind schedule and we were just playing in his office waiting. Not knowing that soon we would wonder if we were losing our son right before our eyes. What a day completely guided by God's hands. Why did he choose to save Caleb? It could have easily gone either way, 6 years ago today. Looking back I see how our Sovereign God worked the day ALL TO HIS GLORY. Thank you LORD for saving this little boy. I pray that I can be the Mom he needs me to be. I pray that I can help prepare him for the job you have for him. He remains in Your hands. I know he is on loan. Thank you for loaning him to me. :) May I be faithful to this great responsibility!

If only...

I have been thinking about how we "if only" our lives. When we were young we want to be older. When we are single we want to be married. When we are married we want children (and hopefully not to be single again). Once we have children the "if onlys" just get worse, we want them older, younger, sleeping, etc. Then we get the kids out of the house and we wish they were back! We just can't be happy with what we have. We are not content with where we are in life.

And you know what? We shouldn't be too comfortable here. This is not our home. We were made to be with God. All our unhappiness is stemming from the deep need to be close to God. If Apostle Paul can tell the Philippians "I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am" (Phil 4:11) while IN JAIL, then what did Paul know that we seem to be missing? We need to understand that we were made to be longing for God and that all this discontent is from our longing, our desires focused on earthly and selfish things instead of what we truly need. God has us right where He wants us. We are in the circumstances that we need to become the people He wants us to be. We need to rejoice where we are, we need to soak up this moment for all it is worth. You never know what God has around the corner so, enjoy where you are. Praise God and seek Him with everything you have.

I am going to go print this off and post it so that when I am tired, the kids are fighting, the home is destroyed after I cleaned it and Eric calls and says he will be late, I will be able to read it and remind myself that I need to treasure this crazy moment. God has blessed me beyond what I deserve. And I am glad He has thought highly enough of me to give me the most amazing husband and kids.